Invariant Desperations

Invariant Desperations

I do not know, who else in the world would read my words, seldom do I wish to know that though!!!
Because it doesn’t make any sense to me as far as I do not publish at least a 120 paged, hardbound book, pleading and falling at the feet of any hard pocketed publisher, where it’s totally a different issue.

So my friend, this is for you.. …

The name is Hari. Linguistically it means “one who abolishes”; can be a bit elaborated to reach “One who abolishes the darkness.” As I said earlier, the name doesn’t just make any sense. It is a simple symbol that makes one recognized among a crowd and I don’t abolish darkness anywhere.
As a matter of fact, I like darkness. I like walking in the darkness, I like staring at the darkness. I like swimming in the darkness. On a no-moon night, sitting beneath a banyan tree in the dense darkness is worth enjoyable. The noise of the trembling banyan leaves will turn to be an illusive music and take you to the deepest level of sleep. You will get the better bed-mates there. The Bats, some night –awake birds, even you may find a beautiful owl perching on one of the higher branches giving you protection. The snakes if there around will be fantastic to give a good company. Its hissing is impressing.
Thus the darkness. More over no one sees me there. They won’t ask me “why am l like this?”, I don’t need to answer their questions. Darkness hides so much of things, mysteriously.
You know the banyan tree is considered to be one of the best atmospheric pollution controllers. She absorbs more CO2 than any other plants and expels good O2. Her roots are deeply networked and reach larger area. Hence she has a good amount of water reservoir capacity. Okay.. Let’s leave all those things to the environmentalist and botanists. Usually in Indian mythology refers thebanyan tree to a Man, male. But I feel and find more of a feminine ecstasy in banyan tree.
It was at a point of darkness every thing has evolved from. The Universe, the big bang, the Stars, the sun, the planets, the satellites, the earth, the sea, the shore, the life.. Everything. Even you have might have felt t the deep enthralling darkness while you were a foetus. Think of your posture when you were securely packed inside your mother’s womb. You are connected to your mother via an umbilical cord and By 30th week, you started sucking your fingers. There too was darkness. Only you felt things. One fine morning, noon, evening or at night or at midnight something started pushing you down the ally and you fall in to the new world. Still the you find darkness there and you didn’t scream for help. The Masonic lady who took you in to her hands patted you back gently to make you scream. Hearing that the half fainted mom gets back to consciousness and forgets the pain she had hitherto. She is taught to feed you at that very instance. A pale coloured, odour-less , tasteless beestings is fed to you. You scream, sleep and wake up with another scream and opening your eyes. The darkness still hits your eyes..

Still I like Darkness. I really hate Name Hari, which means the one who abolishes Darkness.

Desperations
From here I will start describing my Invariant Desperations.